Picture Perfect Paranoia

Dang. It’s one thing after another, isn’t it?

By the time you’ll be reading this post, I’ll be away on a trip to the US to get my VISA passport renewed. For three weeks I’ll be weaned from the Internet, supposedly to “condition” me to a life of no vices and no hobbies. I will have the mindset of a doctor not on my own volition, that’s for sure.

Unfortunately, I won’t be around, either, to witness the fourth anniversary of his hobby blog. Kinda ironic, since I was looking forward to it, yet I won’t be around to witness it. As you see from the paucity in posting rate, I am already conditioned to not think of trivial things, and focus on the goal of the “family”, not mine. I am being indoctrinated, for a lack of a better term. It’s not helping me at all.

Sigh. What can I do, you ask? I’m a human with free will, right? Well, I’ve been taught that it is theoretical, that is, it does not apply universally. To specific cases/conditions/situations does the “free will” exert its force, and in my case, the ability is invalid. Such is the tragedy that befalls my identity. I am the doctor of the family, “Dr. Brion M.D.”, and not who I am. My existence is sorely underestimated.

So much for celebrating an anniversary of what would be an impression I wish to make on my own, not on what others have taught me to be, but on my own personal will. It’s depressing.